So, I’m three hours away from having stayed up all night; from sundown to sunup on the winter solstice. And I have to admit, I’m terribly, terribly tired.
This post is not going to be the most articulate thing that I’ve ever published.
So. Why stay up all night? Well, there’s a very good reason for that. The Cauldron (an amazing pagan site that I strongly recommend) hosted a “Up All Night: Technopagan Solstice Celebration” thing in which several pagans decided that it was their goal to stay up all night to celebrate it being dark for a really long time. (Okay, sarcasm aside, it’s kind of amazing, and I strongly recommend it. Anyhow.)
This is actually a bit of an annual thing. I did it last year too. It was truly exhausting (much like this years) but it was completely worth it.
And it’s kind of nice, honestly. I’ve been lighting candles as the night’s gone on; one candle before midnight, one at midnight, and one after midnight. I’ve been talking with Saule a lot (quite a lot) and while I feel exhausted, I feel like I have a better handle on my life than I did before tonight. Which is funny, because literally nothing’s changed… I just feel like I can deal with things.
I really can’t wait for the night to be over, however. I mean, I do love Saule (ah, my Goddess), but my devotion to her has its limits. For instance, tonight, the limit is eight of clock in the morning, when I’m going to pull myself together, put everything away, and go right to bed.
It’s kind of funny. Right now, as I complete this, I feel like I actually have a ritual calendar. See, in the Summer I celebrate Wep Ronpet, at Halloween I honor Giltine, and at the winter solstice I honor Saule (and then Sekhmet a few days later). And then at the spring equinox, I celebrate Saule again.
I also have a spring thing that I do for Perkunas (ideally, at least) but for the life of me, I can’t remember what it is.
And then beyond the Big Yearly Things, I also have my daily rites for Saule, my monthly ones for Menuo, and whatever I’m doing for Sobek, Ubaste, Apollo, and Marsava.
Hah. I’m going to be honest. The Big Yearly Things are the only things that are ever likely to get done. The daily, monthly, and weekly ritual stuff? I flake. A lot. But that’s okay, because I keep getting back on my ritual feet and working it.
Anyway. Basically, the whole point of this post is that I’m proud of my ritual calendar, and I think I did a great job tonight in not falling apart and going to bed. And now that I’ve written this post, I only have to survive two and a half more hours.
Happy Solstice, everyone!